Brothers and sisters often are enamored with the fact that they want to become the big brother/sister. They think a baby will be so much fun. It is great thought process, as much as the parents can hope that they will be best friends, hang out, and always get along. The truth? Siblings do not always get along, at least in their younger years, and they usually spend much of their time fighting and arguing.
Sibling rivalry is natural and is instigated by age differences, personalities, and their varied personal interests. Their rivalry is developed in a few different ways. Occasionally it is to get their parents attention. Each child wants all of the parent’s attention, or at least more than the other sibling gets.
Another way is to gain power. They have already established their “pecking” order. The eldest child in the family tries to maintain their power of position through size, age, or first arrival. Another approach is to gain ownership. This can be fighting over specific possessions or friends in effort to get parental love and approval. Ultimately, you cannot eliminate sibling rivalry, but you can encourage a healthy relationship between them, and in that process, try to keep the household terrorism to a minimum.
It is vital to set rules and give privileges according to age, sex, and accomplishments. Additionally, promote individual interests. Each child will excel and enjoy different areas than their siblings. Discourage contests between the siblings as much as possible. Lastly, as hard as it is try to ignore the tattling. Tattling can be one of the most aggravating issues with children. React only to your own observations or respond to them with, “To play together, you must cooperate.”